One year ago I got off a plane about 4 or 5 bourbons deep and learned in the late night JFK haze that my best friend Wayne had been found dead in his van, with it still running, apparently of a heart attack. Well, it was pretty apparent it was a heart attack. He was surrounded by McDonald’s wrappers and empty packs of Marlboros. The last time I saw him, a few days prior, he was deep frying porkchops in his kitchen. Come to think of it – that was his nickname from the life before I met him – Pork Chop, or Choppers. Because he liked to eat. I’ve never met someone that would talk about what we were eating for dinner while in the middle of a massive lunch. It became known that within an hour of sitting down next to him at the beach he would ask “What do you have to eat?” We became accustomed to packing extra food in the cooler because, you know, Wayne.
It’s been a weird year since he died. I always steeled myself for the moment – we all knew it was coming. Fast food, cigarettes and obesity end in the same way every time. Fat guys don’t get old. But a depression had sunk into him years before, starting with the recession when bankers brought the world economy to its knees and construction work all but halted. After his death, a depression sank into me. I traveled to the coast of Oregon and spent time hiking alone to try and work out what the universe even means when someone that close to you dies.
So many people have asked if we’re going to do The Lazlow Show again. I don’t know – it’s not really the Lazlow Show without Wayne, just as it’s not the Beastie Boys without MCA. I wholeheartedly appreciate the outpouring of support and kind words from fans of the show and the Rockstar Games work.
I know that this website hasn’t had a lot going on. Same for my Twitter account. I’ve had many thoughts about posts, jokes to put out there. But then I look at social media and see a lot of people complaining, or attacking, or expressing outrage at nonsense. And in a clickbait world, I go quiet. The only real online presence I enjoy these days is Instagram. Cool pics, cool art, people having fun, not complaining about drudgery. Since Wayne died, I concluded that I don’t have time for negative nonsense – and I’d do my best to honor him by focusing on what is cool, and kind, and fun in the world, because we become so blind to that.
Love to Big Wayne – RIP
November 3, 201519 Comments