Lazlow.com

Lazlow Show Episode 50 this Saturday

lazlow — Sun, 19 May 2013 20:19:19 +0000

This Saturday on XM103 / Sirius 206

5-7 PM Eastern

Episode 50

The Lazlow Show Episode 49

lazlow — Thu, 02 May 2013 15:01:17 +0000

The Hurricane Sandy Episode. Where we discuss the ocean entering our homes, living off the grid, arming ourselves against the looting hordes, stealing drugs from friends, the things girls do for drugs, Wayne discovered God from a TV show, and I take my shirt off.

Download it here

*Warning – adult themed content.

Michael. Franklin. Trevor.

lazlow — Mon, 29 Apr 2013 15:12:06 +0000

This guy loves Peanut Butter and Jelly

lazlow — Sun, 28 Apr 2013 16:18:07 +0000

Where the hell have you guys been?

lazlow — Sun, 28 Apr 2013 15:02:05 +0000

I’ve been in radio silence for a few months. This website feels like MySpace these days it’s updated so infrequently. If there were digital tumbleweeds they would be blowing through this site. The reason is we’ve been very very busy working on a certain game. Also, my studio has been a disaster for 6 months. Everything was ripped apart frantically as the ocean came in the house. Tape and digital masters were thrown in bins, equipment pulled out. After the storm the studio was just piles of crap everywhere. It was depressing to even go in there. So i didn’t. Until yesterday. I spent all day organizing, cleaning, rewiring. And then to celebrate, i bought a mess of beer and bourbon and invited a couple of friends over.

and we recorded

The Lazlow Show
Episode 49

Goes online Thursday May 2nd

This preacher said Jesus wanted him to have sex with teen girl

lazlow — Mon, 18 Mar 2013 17:18:23 +0000

Read the story

J C iz ma nigga

lazlow — Tue, 19 Feb 2013 17:15:13 +0000

Let’s watch a movie together about a guy with no hands!

lazlow — Tue, 22 Jan 2013 20:48:15 +0000

I’m 15 minutes into this movie and I absolutely have to share. Watch and post the cringe inducing moments on the comments.

It came out in 1996. Christina Applegate is in it. I don’t remember 1996 being this ridiculously cheesy. What I gather so far is that an aspiring musician loses his hands and somehow gets them replaced with robo future hands and plays techno at rave parties or something.

Moments so far, chronologically….

-the newspaper prop stinks!
-the dialog between father and son is incredible
-why is his girlfriend in bed in the afternoon? Is she a hooker?
-what is this weird forced dialog about protection?
-why doesn’t she wake him up if she knows he has a band gig?
-why is the action sequence/altercation with the drunks SO SLOW. he had ages to see that construction equipment coming. Why didn’t he run out of the car?
-fake arm stumps raised in bed are fantastic
-forced dialog between father and girlfriend outside house
-zoom in on jimmy hendrix hands then pan down to him moping
-why is that dartboard above his bed? where does he stand to throw it? Is it just there to remind him he’ll never throw darts again?
-OMG – love scene with fake hands at 16:57. Why doesn’t he get down to some fisty business?
-HE ASKS HER IF SHE WANTS TO BE STUMP F*CKED! THIS IS AMAZING
-Hobos always sleep in the middle of Times Square
-Why is he breaking into a warehouse to sleep in a cardboard box? Cardboard box sleeping is for OUTSIDE you dolt!
-They’ve set up for a rave and didn’t notice the hobo?
-A swichblade? What is this? 1976?
-Delicate touching of the fake hand and then “you can stay the night.” So romantic!
-37:00 he’s gonna save the day! i can feel it! Fire and knives don’t hurt him!
-50:39 – incredible super computer guy lingo!
-51:27 – amazing description of techno. (thanks boing boing)
1:01 – THEY”RE ALIVE! Robo hands to finger women with

WATCH AND POST YOUR FAVORITE MOMENTS IN THE COMMENTS SECTION!

GTAV Trailer 2

lazlow — Thu, 29 Nov 2012 15:15:14 +0000

Sandy Sucks

lazlow — Tue, 27 Nov 2012 14:57:41 +0000

Come Sail Away

lazlow — Sat, 24 Nov 2012 17:49:57 +0000

The prayers of creepy Styx fans who love teen girls have been answered

Piles of Lives

lazlow — Mon, 19 Nov 2012 18:01:50 +0000

Sandy

lazlow — Fri, 16 Nov 2012 18:15:46 +0000

It’s weird naming hurricanes after people, because everyone I ever meet now named Sandy I’m going to punch in the face.

Life is slowly returning to normal, except that there are cars all over the place completely totaled and the streets are piled head high with the soggy remains of peoples lives. Electricity has finally gone on for most of our town, but there are still police checkpoints and troops patrolling. A lot of people haven’t come back since their houses are uninhabitable. I went to the train station yesterday(no train) but there was a boat still tied to the dock that somehow ended up there. This, by the way, is pretty far away from the water. Like, several blocks. It’s insane that all of these islands off of Long Island were completely covered by ocean on that Monday night. The good news is that I’ve discovered how much I mean to Reed as he hasn’t even called to see if Wayne and I are dead. The better news is that it took an national catastrophe to get Wayne work. He has a whole town to rebuild.

Thanks for all the support over the last few weeks. We’ll get together and do a post Sandy show once i get my studio back together after frantically ripping it apart as the ocean was flooding the street.

Curfews and MREs

lazlow — Sun, 04 Nov 2012 18:51:47 +0000

Yesterday after leaving for 2 days, we brought down supplies and gas for friends. You can see stars for the first time it’s so dark, and armored vehicles plus guys with machine guns are patrolling the streets. Big Wayne got 3 cases of MREs and some water. The lines for gas are ridiculous. Found a good video that shows what the town looks like.

more pics

lazlow — Fri, 02 Nov 2012 00:43:14 +0000

last few nights have been weird. like living in a third world country. no mobile service, electric or water. pitch dark at night. people in the streets crying. national guard troops going through.

pics of hurricane

lazlow — Wed, 31 Oct 2012 15:25:00 +0000

hurricane update

lazlow — Wed, 31 Oct 2012 15:18:39 +0000

hey everyone. I’m posting this message for everyone trying to get in touch with us. long beach is devastated. Monday night the ocean met the bay and waves were coming down our street. cars were floating. big wayne is ok. he is more oceanfront and had waves slamming his building. the boardwalk washed 5 blocks north. they say long beach will be without water or power for weeks. we’ve just driven north on long island to get a mobile signal and post this quick message as people have been trying to get in touch. it truly is an apocalypse movie here. stores have been looted. national guard has 7pm curfew. we have water food and supplies. thanks for all the messages of support.

The Lazlow Show – Episode 48

lazlow — Sun, 28 Oct 2012 01:43:58 +0000

For the past few months this website and the twitter feed have been dark. Most nights and weekends are spent working. And when not working there is Sierra Nevada on tap and the Xbox. However, this morning I went to a music store, bought some extra equipment and set up my home studio to finally do the Lazlow Show the way we’ve always wanted to. Reed took the train out, Wayne showed up(after requesting I go buy him a bottle of rum) and we did a show. Beers and rum were flowing. Episode 48 has happened – officially known as the Unannounced Episode.

Thanks to all the fans who have encouraged us over the years. We love the feedback, and now that we have the studio set up hopefully more of these will occur.

I hope you get some laughs out of this one.

Download the show

Come here boy! Redneck neighbor fight

lazlow — Thu, 02 Aug 2012 16:42:57 +0000

You Know What Dude?

lazlow — Tue, 10 Jul 2012 18:25:27 +0000

I’m on Bob Kelly’s podcast this week. Go here and right click to listen

Fireworks fail

lazlow — Thu, 05 Jul 2012 17:18:25 +0000

Last night in San Diego their fireworks show malfunctioned and they all went off at once. Fireworks love to fail. Here’s a collection of epic fireworks fail.

Ninjas for Jesus

lazlow — Wed, 20 Jun 2012 17:26:32 +0000

When I was living in Oklahoma and attending a megachurch we had a church karate class where we would beat each other senseless with roundhouses and chop flaming boards in half for Jesus. The religious right has now moved on to MMA – and this trailer is fantastic. Teaching a kid to rip another kid’s head off for Jesus! It worked in the crusades and it works today!

I was on the BBC

lazlow — Tue, 22 May 2012 18:08:11 +0000

Max Payne 3 explained

lazlow — Fri, 04 May 2012 19:47:42 +0000

Did a lot of traveling to visit radio stations and show Max Payne 3 – here’s an indepth video on the game – coming May 15th

Get More: GameTrailers.com, GTTV – GTTV Presents Max Payne 3, PC Games, PlayStation 3, Xbox 360

Lazlow Show Episode 47 is posted

lazlow — Mon, 09 Apr 2012 01:22:20 +0000

The ninja episode

Recorded Saturday April 7th 2012 at Anthony’s studio

Download now

Thanks to all the fans who tolerate our nonsense and the wait.

show recorded!

lazlow — Sat, 07 Apr 2012 16:43:34 +0000

~~Recording it and posting it most likely – still sorting out the tech – but there will be a new show posted at some point this weekend.~~

update! show recorded. ep 47! will be posted Sunday after bunny Jesus festivities. holy shit the things that came out in this show.

Getting a show together is like herding cats

lazlow — Thu, 15 Mar 2012 18:18:29 +0000

So a few weeks ago we tried to get some dates together for a show. Then our studio fell through and Wayne stopped returning calls for a couple of weeks. We’re trying to line up some days, but as some of you may have noticed we’re working on a game that comes out in 2 months, so we’re a bit busy. And reed is trying to make a baby.

We’re going to do some shows this year and to insure that we actually do it – BE NICE and stop posting horrible shit on the comments.

UPDATE

I was talking to Reed on the phone seeing if he can do this weekend(no he can’t he’s going on a vacation to KINGSTON jamaica of all places) and he asked if he could call me back, because someone famous was on the other line. Then he never called me back.

See what i’m up against?

UPDATE 2

Friday morning 3/16 – called reed just now (he never called me back last night). I had March 31st on the calendar for a show – but he informs me that the Final Four basketball tournament is that night, so he can’t make it, because he has to watch it on TV. There is nothing more pathetic than grown men watching college sports. YOUR GLORY DAYS ARE OVER! You’re not young and going to keggers anymore. Take off your class ring and your childish things and watching young hot 18 year old men run back and forth and jump up and down. Sheesh!

So he agreed to April 7th, but maybe his High School will get into the spelling bee championships or something and he’ll cancel again.

MAx Payne 3 Gameplay trailer

lazlow — Thu, 15 Mar 2012 17:27:39 +0000

I have been dewormed

lazlow — Sun, 26 Feb 2012 17:57:16 +0000

And evidently implanted with a microchip. It’s like that book Snow Crash, but real!

Rugby is a man’s game

lazlow — Fri, 24 Feb 2012 04:17:47 +0000

I can say that because I broke a finger playing it yesterday.

Check out these fools. No helmets or pads. Amazing. Throwing a ball backwards is counter-intuitive at first. And there is no stupid huddle. Or commercial time out. People are still in a writhing pile and the game keeps going.

FYI…We appear to have secured a studio to use in the next couple of weeks. Mine is with the Protools guys getting worked on.

PS typing with taped up fingers sucks and i look like i got into a “one in the pink two in the stink” accident