“Fuckin magnets, how do they work? And i don’t want to talk to a scientist, ya’ll motherfuckin lying and getting me pissed.” from the song Miracles

Yeah – scientists are liars. They don’t wear clown makeup.

“The fruitcakes will still lose and the voice of the peoples republic of California will be heard!”

“I do not want my tax dollars going to support them in any manner. I hope they all stay in California.”

“The downfall of any society happens in tiny increments.”

“Anyone in jail for polygamy should be set free.”

“You stupid satanic fool”

“Fruitcakes! Just a bunch of fruitcakes!”

( i take issue with that last one. Are they saying normal people don’t eat fruitcakes, but fruitcakes do eat other fruitcakes?)

and the best quote is the one from the judge’s decision:

[A]ffording same-sex couples the opportunity to obtain the designation of marriage will not impinge upon the religious freedom of any religious organization, official, or any other person; no religion will be required to change its religious policies or practices with regard to same-sex couples, and no religious officiant will be required to solemnize a marriage in contravention of his or her religious beliefs.

can we make a law to mind your own business?

I’ll be the MC and a featured speaker at this weekend’s big hacker convention titled The Next HOPE. These events are truly amazing with talks every hour on all kinds of electronic madness. There’s a lockpicking workshop where you can learn some tricks, jailbreak your phone, as well as vintage gear to check out. Tons of vendors bring cool devices that shut down TVs in bars, etc.

It’s at the Hotel Pennsylvania, across from Penn Station. Come hang out with thousands of hackers, activists, nerds, music fans, and former FBI and CIA guys who tell amazing stories of surveillance, counterespionage, and other trippy tails.

My dumb speech is Saturday at noon.

and then my other favorite

we’ll see if this happens.

On the island of Vis, a local takes us up into the hills, to an abandoned airstrip used by British bombers making runs to turn German cities into fireballs. The runway is all vineyards now, only the red and white striped pylons remain. Dinner on a farm nearby with a Croatian family and some of their homemade wine brings stories of the British airmen who, hobbled by anti-aircraft guns and their gunner dead, ditched at sea and were rescued by local fishermen. One of the downed airmen, an 87 year old, returned recently, rented a plane, and buzzed the old vineyard covered landing strip one last time, waving at the leathery farmers below.

There is no love for the Italians. Besides most recently invading and making a drunken nuicance in the summer season, in too recent memory they joined with Germany and invaded local islands and coastal towns with flamethrowers and burned houses to the ground. Hike in the forest along the coast 50 km south of Dubrovnik and you’ll find trenches connecting crude cement bunkers with small windows for machine gun nests on three sides, something I’d only witnessed in a video game until now.

Speaking of video games, in the window – a croatian magazine with John Marston on the cover and a big Red Dead Redemption logo and cryptic Croatian titles – it lured me into a little shop in a sleepy port town. They have more copies coming soon he said. To celebrate, I pick up a few liters of Croatian beer(they sell in 1 and 2 liter bottles, like gasoline) and stumble down the rocky wharf road by old fishing boats, hoping I can get some fish soup and a coke come morning.

Two days ago I started to get in my car and noticed i’d been sideswiped, and then begin to wonder if I was in the car when it happened and didn’t remember it.

I heart you beer.  You bring the mystery to life.

What does frustrate me is the current state of technology journalism. It’s turned into a bunch of elitist whiners who throw bloggy tantrums over the MOST IRRELEVANT THINGS EVER. Take, for instance, the rants of a few tech journalists against the Ipad as somehow being draconian and the Iphone to be horribly limited and betraying our human civil rights. If you went back in a time machine to 1988 and showed someone and Iphone and whined about how horrible it was, they would beat you with a tire iron for being a self absorbed unappreciative dick. THIS is what’s wrong with your life? Really? You can’t make copies of movies you bought in Itunes? Entire continents don’t have indoor plumbing, swim in sewage, and die from a mosquito bite and you in your hipster geek glasses and Prius are whining about your apps? Good going self absorbed prick.

Wow. I think i just did a Technofile there.

The new site has comments. It’s going to be available until people begin acting like children. Be nice. Don’t call names. If you disagree with someone, don’t be mean. Don’t post something you wouldn’t say to someone’s face.

Thanks for stopping by.

Life in the west

The Law

and multiplayer

The audio is here.

Thanks to all the fans who have stuck through the menagerie of madness – we’ll make this thing happen.

Just got a text from Anthony. We are on for next weekend! Hope you enjoy hearing the phone call above.

The Lazlow Show

including the story of Wayne who let himself in my house this week, took a crap, and left.

So the show is canceled.

Again.

I’m sorry to drag this out for everyone. As soon as we have a new date we’ll post it.

CRAP!

Streamed live online at Anthony’s channel

Thanks to all the fans for helping out with this.

Download it here

UPDATE: Just got off phone w/ reed. says his ass feels like he spent the night in a bathhouse. He picked up E Coli in Brazil. Must have eaten some feces tainted meat in Rio. Show moved to Saturday Feb 20

older post:
Reed has just sent a text saying he picked up a bug in Brazil(he got back Thursday night). He’s at the doctors right now. There’s a possibility he’ll be at home tonight watching the movie Philadelphia over and over and crying.

We’ve also been hit with a snowstorm, and Wayne isn’t returning my calls. He must have picked up a QP last night.

Will give a status report when i have it as to whether or not the show is on.

from Reuters

When we left K-Rock, XM welcomed us with open arms. There was no contract, there was a tremendous amount of respect from management, and we brought a lot of listeners to satellite judging by the amount of email we got. We were told we could do shows whenever we wanted. There were fans that subscribed to the online stream just so they could listen live from overseas.

XM was taken over by Sirius, and we were shocked at the difference in culture. At Rockstar I am blessed to be involved with some great people who believe that their creative people are the most important component to making your creative product. And the job of management and lawyers is to stand by and defend your product. End of story. It is a far cry from the radio industry these days. I LOVE radio, and it guts me to see what it’s turned into. When you ask lawyers if it’s ok to be funny, you’re doomed to failure.

The Lazlow Show will not be returning to satellite radio. Sirius walked through the door and cut our fee by 75%, demanded to own the name of the show, our entire back catalog of shows, all future shows, and refused to allow us to put the show on our website which we’ve been doing since day one. Plus they said we would no longer be able to sell box sets of the show.

I have a lot of intense feelings on the matter, but at the end of the day that’s the way they choose to do business and unfortunately we don’t work that way. There are some big supporters of our show, including Opie and Anthony as well as Rob Cross, who started the show at K-Rock in the first place. We wholeheartedly thank them for believing in us over the years.

The show will continue – online. Our next show is scheduled for Saturday February 6th at 6pm eastern. It will be streamed live online and also posted for download. See you then.

Pie charts are supposed to add up to 100%. Not with Fox News. They add up to 193%.

Accuracy has never been their strong suite.

Scientists.

You know, the people that invented the computer, the rocket engine, the iphone, GPS, roller coasters, the Internet and artificial hearts. They are part of a CONSPIRACY!!!

They will sit around in their sciencey clothes and cackle with glee as they pull a big one on the world! “HA HA HA YOU STUPID MORONS! WE’RE SCIENTISTS! NOW YOU HAVE TO DRIVE SISSY ELECTRIC CARS CAUSE WE TOTALLY SCARED THE SHIT OUT OF YOU!

HA! YOU ALL LOOK SO GAY WITH YOUR SOLAR PANELS!

Members of Congress, especially whores like Sen. James Inhofe who has been deep throating oil company campaign money, are trumpeting the lines their pimps have been providing them, furthering their ridiculous line of reasoning that 1. Scientists are idiots or 2. Scientists are trying to fool us.

The rest of the first world(which by the way has universal health insurance) has accepted that climate change is real and that we need to do something about it. Here in the United States people look like babies throwing tantrums cause they’re scared of change.

It’s really simple actually. If you put a bunch of people in a room, pretty soon it gets hot and stuffy. If everyone in a football dome holds up a lighter, eventually it will get really hot in there. Welcome to the concept that billions of people on the earth burning shit makes it get hot. Not a hard concept to grasp.

And why would anyone want to spend their life’s work proving that we’re fucked? “Hey guys, I was right, i’ve done 30 years of climate research, and we’re fucked. Isn’t that awesome?”

Nobody seems to explain what rationale or motive there would be for scientists to hoodwink everyone on the planet. There isn’t profit to be made. Strangely, or not so strangely, the ones spreading the most amount of disinformation about global warming are the ones making billions burning fossil fuels.